My most basic artistic downfall is that I am always searching for "the thing." In my mind, "the thing" is a series, concept, or technique that will be wholly responsible for sending me down the rabbit hole into glorious artistic wonderment that will result in the start of my successful artistic career. Galleries will fling open their doors to me, articles will be written, former professors will send congratulations, buyers will adore having my pieces be part of their homes.
"The thing" is not a slow journey of gradual discovery. It is the be-all and end-all. It is the destination. It is what I've always been searching for and it will perfectly communicate my artistic message. Whatever that is. Minor detail.
Instead of finding "the thing," I hop from medium to medium, style to style, series to series, distracted by new shiny objects. I have fun and I learn in the process, but I also put absurd amounts of pressure on the current exploration to be "the thing" that I tend to cut and run at the first sign of a dead end. I am on a mental car ride with a vague idea of where I am going, but no road map. I take guesses at turns and go in circles.
Logically, I know I should settle in, Find a good radio station, consider the position of the sun, maybe even ask a few people for directions. Experience has told me, however, that this is just how I operate. I get antsy. I ask if we're there yet. I have to stop to pee.
Maybe someday I will enjoy the journey more. I might find a way for my divergent interests and thoughts to congeal into a neat little package. For now, I follow the shiny object.
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